can't sleep

For the past days, I couldn't sleep early even if I wanted to. There are just a lot of things bothering me right now. I've given it much thought but it seems like I don't feel peaceful. At this point, I just wanna be some place else... Probably go to the beach and take a long walk along the sea shore. That might clear my head. But I think what I really prefer is to take that walk with my honey. I guess spending time with him is what I really need to feel better... to feel at ease. I just don't know when that will be. :(

Anyways, just to make my mood lighter, I thought of consulting Facebook's "God wants You to Know" application, hehehe. And here's what I've got:

"On this day of your life, we believe God wants you to know ...
that when you come to a wall, you can either climb it,
or you can simply walk around until you find a door.
Don't make life so hard, - look for the doors!"

I guess that means I should not be so hard on myself and try not to make things complicated. So I better stop worrying then. Oh, Lord, I pray for wisdom that I may be able to find those doors.

why, oh, why?

I just finished doing my work and was about to hit the sack when a sudden gush of mixed emotions ran through me. It was then followed by different thoughts that I couldn't describe or put into words yet. It's like a feeling of fear and anxiety topped with some feeling of insecurity. Gosh! I hate it when I feel this way. It seems like am losing touch of that inner child in me wherein I still get to be bubbly, happy and optimistic amidst the obstacles that I go through. Oh well, I think most people go through this stage once in a while. What's important is that you still keep yourself sane, right? Hahaha. Anyways, I guess am just stressed out and I need to take a relaxing (or make that, rejuvenating?) break. Despite all these mixed emotions, I still am grateful because I know that God is there to continue guiding me and giving me inspiration. I also have my love-ones (from family to relatives to friends) who I know I could count on. :)

don't know where to start

Wow! I just realized that it's already been 14 months and 6 days (to be exact, hehe) since the last time I wrote in this blog. Because of that realization, I honestly do not know where to start or what to say. A lot of my friends at work, especially Ate Maia of Maia's Scribbles, have been reminding me once in a while to update my blog already but I just didn't feel like writing yet, hehe; or maybe I've just come to accept the fact that whether I update my blog or not, they still know what's going on with my life, hahaha. Now that I feel like updating this blog, I can't put anything into writing because there are sooooo many things that are going through my mind at this time and I don't know which ones to entertain, hahaha. Oh well, I guess I need to park my pen for now, just for now, until I get to sort things out so I could compose my thoughts more clearly... ^_^

saturday blues

It is still a work day for me today. However, I don't feel like working at all! I feel kinda lazy and my mind just drifts to doing something else. Like go for a walk, take a swim, watch a movie, read a book, listen to music, or just curl up on my bed and sleep. Hahay... I just feel like doing anything besides work, hehehe. Oh well, I may just be feeling tired because I've been trying to reach our quota for the past few days. Hopefully, this will pass... Well, this feeling should pass soon or else I won't get any work done today, hehehe.

Alright, have to end my rants for now and try to focus on what needs to be done today. Wish me luck, guyz!

the silence of a man and a woman

As I checked my Friendster account, I noticed that one of my friends -- Lileth -- edited her shout out. The quote caught my attention because I somehow found truth into it, hehe. So to put an end to your speculations, here is the quote:

"Funny how...

A man's silence
can break a woman's heart into a thousand pieces.

While a woman's silence
can give a man a thousand moments of confusion."

True, isn't it? This may not apply to all but somehow I can relate to this. I even witnessed this happening to some of my friends. When a man suddenly becomes quiet (especially in a middle of an argument) and doesn't talk to us even if we try to fix things, we feel like our heart has been shattered into a million pieces. And when it's the woman's turn to become silent, the man then becomes soooo confused... tries to woo you... and if you won't budge, it's his turn to get angry or irritated. It seems like a cycle, huh? Hehehe. But this case doesn't only happen when you have fights. It also happens during regular occassions or in our every day life. Oh well, I just thought of sharing it. How about you? What do you think?

taking it slow

For the past couple of weeks, I have been really busy with work because our team needs to reach the monthly quota among other things. It's just today that my tasks are a little bit light so I just took this day slowly, hehe, since tomorrow will be another long day. Sigh.

However, I'm feeling excited today. Why? Because there's only about an hour left before I finally log out from work then I'm off to the city with my mamie, nephew and cousin-in-law to unwind... Yipee! I soooo wanted to have this time out and what a better way to spend it than be with my love ones. Right? :D

What Love Is

I know the topic of this post is a bit late considering that Valentine's Day is already over (about 20 days ago to be exact, hehehe). However, we cannot deny the fact that be it hearts day or not, all of us experience love everyday... one way or another. We feel love from our family, friends, special someone, and even strangers who just show compassion to us. We not only receive love but we also share them to others. So I just thought of making this post and talk about my views on love.

When people are asked how they define L0VE, we get a lot of different answers. That is why we refer to love as being subjective... because our definitions or descriptions are based on our life experiences. Now, if you ask me, I believe that love is more than just the emotions or the attraction that you feel for your partner. Love is also a Decision -- a decision that will give you strength and inspiration to make the relationship work especially when obstacles come your way. But what's best is that when you make such decision, you have to seek for God's grace and guidance then all else will follow.

Having said that, I'd like to share with you one of my favorite descriptions about love (or shall I say, one of the best definitions I've ever encountered). Here it is:

"L0VE is patient, love is kind.
It is not jealous, (love) is not pompous,
it is not inflated, it is not rude,
it does not seek its own interests,
it is not quick-tempered,
it does not brood over injury,
it does not rejoice over wrongdoing
but rejoices with the truth.
It bears all things, believes all things,
hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never fails."

Sounds familiar, right? Well, that definition is taken from the Bible specifically from 1st Corinthians chapter 13 verses 3 to 4. I couldn't add anything to it anymore because it speaks for itself already. All I could say is that this verse serves as one of my inspirations in dealing with my relationship right now. Plus, this definition of love doesn't only limit you to the boy-girl and husband-wife relationships. It is universal. It does not only talk about the love between a couple but also the love of a person for his/her family, friends, relatives and others.

a glimpse of my new baby

Uh-huh, you heard me right... Not that I'm pregnant or anything though, hehehe. I just wanna consider this site as my new baby.

Actually, at first, I only thought of having a blog that will showcase inspiring or wonderful quotes and messages; thus, I created Walking Down Quotes Lane. However, it dawned on me that it would probably be good if I create a personal site. A place where I could express my thoughts and opinions, share my life experiences, or just simply find a haven where I could just rant and rave (not that I often do that, haha). It's just that writing makes me feel good especially when I want to pour out my soul into it. I don't consider myself a good writer but I just love writing especially when the mood strikes, hehe. So that inspired me to create this site -- Zharie's Haven -- that will simply showcase my world, my life and my journey.

Having said that, I welcome you all into my new site and may this be a start of a wonderful journey with you being a part of it...